My Only Competition
My only competition is myself. I heard this statement today for the first time by Tyler Perry at the 10x Growth Conference. My mind is blown because it’s so simple and yet so true. I can feel my entire outlook on life expanding. This is exactly the opposite of how I’ve lived my whole life thus far. Now I see an entirely different range of possibilities before me.
My competitive spirit
As a middle child, I have always been very competitive. I competed with my older sister, always trying to keep up with what she was doing. I also competed with my younger brother as he was the boy they always wanted. Whether they always wanted a boy or not, I believed they did. My paternal grandparents first gift to me was an orange Tonka dump truck (which I still have). My parents also stopped having children after my brother was born, so that was a pretty good clue.
One of the songs that my dance teacher had my sister and I learn and perform was “Anything You Can Do I Can Do better!” She couldn’t have chosen a better song for me, because that has been my life anthem! It didn’t stop with my siblings, but my classmates, cousins, and peers as well. I had to be the best at everything I did! That fact that I wasn’t the best was a constant agitator, and led to my belief that I would never be good enough.
Why it hit so hard
That is why Tyler’s statement, “My only competition is myself” hit so hard. My mentor Trish Blackwell has always said “stay in your lane, don’t worry about what anyone else is doing.” That didn’t really sink in until yesterday when I heard Tyler Perry speak. Now I get it. Staying in my own lane felt like I was trying to put blinders on so I wasn’t seeing what others were doing. Having no other competitors removes everyone but myself. It is such a freeing concept!
Now I don’t need to care what others are doing. I can be happy for them, but I don’t need to compare myself to them. I am on my own path, going at my own pace. My journey is going to be different than anyone else’s, and that excites me! As I write this I’m enduring the first cold I’ve had since 2019. My motivation is practically non existent, and productivity almost zero. I’m not beating myself for this though, because I won’t heal if I don’t rest. I know my body and what works best for me. By honouring my own unique journey, I am practicing grace and compassion for myself. This is something I have in abundance for others, but still working on applying to own life.
Why being my only competition matters
Being my only competition matters, because now the unrealistic expectations I’ve always had for myself are gone. How can I achieve the same things that someone born into vast wealth has? I may not be able to do it the way they did, but I can achieve it my way. I can use the incredible brain God gave me to come up with ideas and plans to achieve my goals in accordance with His will. If God wanted me to do it their way, I would have been them. For once I’m actually glad to me!
The freeing thing is realizing that I don’t have to do it their way. I can glean important concepts and tools from how they achieved their success, but then use them in a way that works for me. Now I get to live up to my standards, not anyone else’s. My path is unique, and that’s what makes my journey mine. This realization literally feels like I’m dropping the armour and chains that have held me back from fully embracing my destiny. I can do anything I set my mind to; and for once I actually believe it!!!
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